Porkless Dandan Mian

Dandan noodles are Schezuanese street noodles that are rich, spicy, and filling. Definitely my latest culinary obsession! The name comes from the stick called a dan dan that vendors walk down the street with carried over the shoulder. From the end of the stick hangs a pair of baskets: one with the noodles and the other with the sauce.  Though there's no stick involved here, there's enough big, amazing, rich Schezuan flavor here to make you think that you've magically been transported to Chengdu if you take a bite and close your eyes. I'm especially proud of the tofu/mushroom pork substitute in this recipe that will literally fool any carnivore you serve this dish to. If anybody bitches to you that they think tofu is gross, feed them this dish and tell them to shut the hell up!

Normally served fiery hot, my recipe is a bit more tame, but you can dial up the heat with chili flakes when you serve it (like I do!). Anything in the ingredient list that you don't already have in the pantry can be acquired at any Asian grocer and most ingredients will even be at a standard supermarket.

Prep time: 3 cocktails

Noodles:
8 ounces dry noodles

Tofu/mushroom "pork":

1 package extra firm tofu
2 TBSP soy sauce
2 TBSP fish sauce
2 TBSP brown sugar
1/2 tsp toasted sesame oil
1 TBSP Sambal Oelek (NOT Siracha--Sambal Oelek is much better!)
2 1/2 TBSP Chinese black vinegar (Chinkiang vinegar) - available at any Asian grocer
6 TBSP hong you (Szechuan chili oil), recipe here, divided
~12 shiitake or crimini mushrooms, washed
3 scallions, chopped
8 cloves garlic
1 TBSP ginger, grated

Broth:
1/3 cup peanut butter
1 1/2 cups vegetable stock, store-bought or homemade
2 TBSP mirin cooking wine
1-2 TBSP oyster sauce
1-2 TBSP soy sauce
1/2 tsp toasted sesame oil

Toppings:
2 tsp Schezuan peppercorns
Bean sprouts or steamed bok choi (optional)
Red chili flakes or the red chilies from the bottom of your Hong You (Szechuan chili oil)
3 scallions, chopped

Drain and rinse the block of tofu. Wrap it in a dish towel and place a weighted plate on top to press out excess moisture, at least 30 minutes. This step is critical if you want the right "pork" consistency for your tofu.

As tofu is getting pressed, make the broth by combining all the broth ingredients except the sesame oil in food processor and process until combined. Transfer to a pan on the stovetop, add toasted sesame oil, and keep warm it up to serving temperature and maintain at that temperature until you're ready to serve.

Prep the noodles according to their directions, rinse and set aside.

Place a small, dry frying pan on the stovetop and heat on medium heat. Add the Schezuan peppercorns and toast until they darken a little bit and become s bit smoky and fragrant. Transfer to a spice grinder and process into a powder. Set aside.

Now make the tofu/mushroom pork:
In a small bowl, whisk together soy sauce, fish sauce, brown sugar, toasted sesame oil, vinegar, and Sambal Oelek. Set aside. After the tofu has been pressed for at least 30 minutes, crumble it up by hand into fairly small crumbles. Place a large frying pan over medium-high heat and add 3 TBSP hong you. Once the oil shimmers, add the crumbled tofu. Continue to stir and break up the tofu with a metal spatula until it is lightly browned and a bit crisped--but not totally fried! Remove from heat and transfer tofu to a plate. Now, take a food processor and pulse the mushrooms until the pieces are no larger than about 1/4" -- about 8 good pulses. Put the frying pan from the tofu right back on that medium-high burner and add the other 3 TBSP hong you. Then add the mushrooms. Saute until they turn a deeper brown, shrink down to about half of their original volume, and break down into a semi-paste. Then add the 3 TBSP scallions, garlic, and ginger. Saute another 1-2 minutes. Now incorporate the soy and fish sauce combination you made at the beginning of this step, as well as the tofu that you've set aside. Stir just until everything has been incorporated and remove from heat.

Now dish up by laying a bed of noodles in the bottom of the bowl. Add bean sprouts, tofu/mushroom pork, and ladle broth over the top. Garnish with a pinch of Schezuan peppercorn powder and as much red chili flakes or the red chilies from the bottom of your hong you as you can handle!! EAT! 

Vegetarian Hong You Chao Shou! Boom!

These spicy Szechuan tempeh wontons are amazing. Full stop. Ordinarily, these are made of pork, but this tempeh version is just as good (seriously). The origin of these dumplings (according to the interwebs) is that the Sichuanese traditionally wore wear large robes in cold weather under which they put their hands in the opposite sleeves to keep warm. This gesture--chao shou translates to 'folded hands'--resembles the shape of the dumpling with opposite corners of the wrapper pinched together. In fact, you can go into a restaurant in Sichuan to this day and wordlessly cross your arms and they'll bring you this dish, knowing exactly what you've just asked for by gesture alone. However, if you make it at home, you'll likely associate a massive fist pump and a dance around the dining room with this dish because that's what you'll do after tasting the first bite. It's that good.

Prep time: 3 cocktails

Wontons:
4 TBSP peanut oil
8 ounces tempeh, crumbled
2" piece of ginger grated with Microplane or finest side of cheese grater
5 cloves garlic, minced
White parts of 4-5 scallions, chopped
1/2 tsp ground white pepper
3 TBSP soy sauce
2 TBSP rice wine
1 egg, beaten
Store-bought wonton wrappers (you can use small for pot-stickers or big for egg rolls)

Sauce:
1-2 tsp toasted sesame oil
4 TBSP Hong You (Szechuan chili oil), recipe here
2 TBSP soy sauce
2-3 TBSP Zhenjiang (or Chinkiang) black vinegar (available at any Asian grocer)

Garnish:
A small drizzle of toasted sesame oil
Green parts of 4-5 scallions, sliced into small wheels
Sesame seeds (optional)

Heat peanut oil over medium-high heat in frying pan or wok. When hot, add tempeh and stir fry for about 2 minutes. Add ginger, garlic, and scallion whites. Continue to stir fry until tempeh begins to turn golden brown, about 3-5 more minutes. Stir in white pepper, soy sauce, and rice wine and cook for a few more seconds. Remove from heat and stir for a few more seconds.

Start the sauce by combining all sauce ingredients over low heat, stirring occasionally. Also, put medium to large pot with water on the stove to boil--this pot will be for boiling the wontons.

Now fold your mixture into wontons. If you're using big egg roll wontons, you'll use about 1/4 cup of tempeh mixture; if you're using small pot-sticker-size wontons, it'll be more like a TBSP of mixture. Place the mixture in the middle of each wonton sheet, then brush the edges of the dough with egg using a pastry brush. Now fold the wonton over to make a triangle and use your fingers to firmly seal the edges. Traditionally, you'll also fold the two points of the longest section of triangle back together and connect these tips to make a "cap" shape, but this step is optional.

Now gently lower the wontons into your pot of boiling water. Boil until they have had time to cook through--about 3 minutes for small wontons or 5-6 minutes for large wontons. Remove with slotted spoon. Serve with generous portion of sauce and add garnishes.

Hong You (Szechuan chili oil)

Don't buy chili oil at the Asian grocer! That foul, artificially-colored garbage is the surest way to screw up an otherwise perfect Chinese meal! This takes only a few minutes to throw together and will keep almost indefinitely. Also, it is great as a finishing oil, in salad dressings or marinades, and can add awesomeness to just about any sauteed dish. Note, however, that you need a deep-frying or candy thermometer. You can get one for a few bucks at any kitchen store or big box store that sells kitchen stuff.

For the chilies, you can use plain chili flakes from any grocery store or go to an Asian market to buy specific types of chili flakes. You can also buy whole dried chilies and puree in a food processor.

Prep time: 1/2 cocktail

2 cups canola or peanut oil
3 cloves garlic, smashed with the side of your knife and peeled
6 1/2" sections of ginger, also smashed with the side of your knife
4 whole star anise pods
6-10 black cardamom seeds
6-8 whole cloves
1/2 cup chili flakes
1 cinnamon stick broken in half
1/2 tsp ground Szechuan peppercorns, (optional, grind in a cleaned coffee grinder after a brief dry fry)
1 tsp sea salt

Heat the oil (with the thermometer in it) in a small pan over medium heat until it reaches 285 Fahrenheit. AS SOON as it hits 285, remove from heat and add ginger and garlic. Don't stir.

While oil is heating or right after you add garlic and ginger, combine star anise, cardamom, cloves, chili flakes, broken cinnamon stick, and peppercorns in a small dish. AS SOON as the oil temperature drops to 250, add this dish of spices. Also, don't stir.

As soon as the temperature drops to 200, use a wooden spoon or tongs to fish out the ginger and garlic. If you don't do this, they'll cause the oil to go rancid over time.

Now let the oil cool to room temperature. Stir in salt. Transfer to a glass jar with good lid and let sit at least 24 hours before using. The taste will improve over time and it'll stay good unrefrigerated for at least 3 months. After three days, you can strain out all the solids if you think the taste is vibrant enough, but they can remain in as long as you want to continue to infuse the oil with additional flavor. Also, if the oil is too strong for you, dilute with a cup of plain canola oil.

Fried Forbidden Black Rice

Hawt Damn, this is good. Probably my favorite fried rice recipe, in fact. This goes great with Mapo Doufu, as the mild umami notes in the rice complement the fiery tofu quite well.

I’ve discovered fried rice is best if you are using cold rice, as it tends to clump less. So if possible, make the rice a few hours ahead of time and chill it (or use leftover rice). And you don’t have to stick with broccoli, cabbage, and carrots. You can use any veggies you like: eggplant, peas, bell peppers, sprouts, bok choi, spinach, mushrooms, water chestnuts, and just about anything else you want to throw in there is fine. Just remember to wait until you are almost done cooking before you add the tender veggies, like sprouts. Tofu, shrimp, or meat can also be added. And finally, you can use any type of rice--I just really love Forbidden Black.

Prep time: 3/4 cocktail (about 20 minutes)

3 TBSP soy sauce
3 TBSP oyster sauce
1 TBSP rice vinegar
2 tsp sugar
1 TBSP Siracha (optional)
6 TBSP peanut oil, divided
½ of a medium red onion, sliced into thin slivers
1 small floret broccoli, broken or cut up
2-inch piece of ginger, grated
5 cloves garlic, minced
1-2 carrots, cut into matchsticks
1 cup of cabbage, shredded
2-3 eggs, beaten
2 cups prepared, chilled rice (Forbidden Black, or any other type)
1 big dash of white pepper or ground Szechuan peppercorns, if available
4 green onions, chopped

In a small bowl, whisk together the soy sauce, oyster sauce, rice vinegar, sugar, and Siracha. Set aside.

Put a wok over high heat and add 2 TBSP of peanut oil. When it gets hot (but before it starts smoking), add red onion and broccoli and sauté for a 30 seconds. Add ginger and garlic and stir fry for 30 more seconds. Add carrot and cabbage and sauté for another minute or two until the cabbage is a bit tender but not mushy. Remove from heat and transfer to a bowl.

Return the wok to the stovetop and add 2 more TBSP peanut oil. When hot, add egg and scramble the hell out of the egg—you don’t want any very big pieces remaining. When egg is cooked (BUT NOT DRIED OUT!) remove and transfer to a second bowl.

Now return the wok to the heat and add remaining 2 TBSP of oil. When hot, add the rice. Break up any clumpiness in the rice as you stir fry it. Now comes the critical part—once it’s all hot and broken up, you want to stop stirring the rice for a minute or two, so that the grains on the bottom become a bit crisped (if you want very fried rice, you can stir it up and let it cook like this a second time). Add the pepper and scallions and stir fry it all for 15 more seconds.

Now toss in the veggie mixture and egg mixture, as well as the soy sauce mixture. Stir fry everything for a few more seconds, remove, and let sit a minute before serving.

First Recipe: Mapo Doufu

Mapo Doufu translates to "Pockmarked Old Woman’s Tofu." This dish’s roots supposedly go back centuries to the Chinese city of Chengdu in Szechuan, where an old, disfigured widow was ostracized to the outskirts of town. Because they couldn’t afford to stay in the town while they waited for their goods to sell, many poor farmers and traders also found themselves staying on the outskirts of town. By happy coincidence, the story goes, the farmers and traders eventually found the old woman and her amazing cooking. She soon became the pride of the city and her tofu is still the local favorite. Or something. All I know is this shit is delicious. Had it last night with fried rice.

If you've ever had Mapo Doufu, at a Chinese restaurant, this might be different than what you've eaten—it won’t resemble the nasty, thick, sweet-and-sour mapo doufu that you sometimes see at restaurants in the US. Instead, this recipe is fiery, nuanced, complex, and very delicious.

Note that Szechuan Peppercorns are not related to black peppercorns. And because they add a very important smoothing element to the dish, you cannot substitute anything for it. But fret not! The pepper—along with any of the other unique ingredients below—can be purchased at any Asian grocer.

Prep time: 1 cocktail (30 minutes)

3 tablespoons Szechuan chili oil

3 small dried hot red peppers (optional)

1 TBSP fermented black bean paste (no more!)

1 tsp Gochujang

1 TBSP minced garlic

1 TBSP ginger, grated with microplane

10 ounces shiitake mushrooms, stemmed and chopped fairly finely

15 ounce block extra firm tofu cut into 1” cubes

1 teaspoon finely ground Sichuan peppercorns

1 TBSP soy sauce

1 teaspoon toasted sesame oil

2 tsp rice vinegar

1 tsp Chinese Black vinegar (Chinkiang vinegar)

2 tsp sugar

1 TBSP corn starch, dissolved in 3 TBSP cold water

½ cup slivered scallions, both white and green parts

Cooked rice or congee (Chinese rice porridge) for serving

 

Heat the chili oil over medium heat in a very large frying pan or large Dutch oven. When hot, add chili peppers, black bean paste, and Gochujang. Sauté, stirring, for ~1 minute. Then add garlic and gingers and sauté 1-2 more minutes, stirring. Next add mushrooms and stir well. Cook the mushrooms until the liquid they release has cooked off and the mushrooms turn a darker shade of brown, about 10 minutes, stirring frequently.

 

While mushrooms are cooking, place a medium saucepan that’s 2/3 full of water that is salted to about the level of seawater over high heat. When it reaches a boil, add the cubed tofu and immediately remove from heat. Let tofu steep in the salt water to absorb some saltiness for 15 minutes, then carefully drain it without breaking the tofu. 

 

Now back to the mushrooms: once they have cooked down and turned to a darker color of brown, add the ground Sichuan peppercorns and stir in for about a minute. Then add 1 ½ cups of water, soy sauce, sesame oil, both vinegars, and sugar. Bring back to a boil then reduce to medium-low and simmer for 5 minutes, stirring. 

 

Add cornstarch mixture and stir for 2-3 more minutes until the sauce has thickened up. Now, you need to balance the flavor. It is likely that you will need to add more black vinegar, soy sauce (or salt), and/or sugar to get just the right balance. Be careful not to overdo anything though. You want a sauce that is well harmonized. 

 

Now very gently stir in the tofu, being careful not to break the cubes. Let simmer for another minute or two. Remove from heat, garnish with scallions and serve!