Thursday, August 8, 2024

How to doctor fake burger meat

Have you ever noticed that Impossible and Beyond imitation ground beef smells like goddamn catfood when you open it? And while both fake meats taste a lot more like burgers compared with the fake meat product of yesteryear, they still aren't marvelous. This is my quick hack to make those products taste (and smell) a lot better!

You can also get creative with this. In addition to what's below, I sometimes add dried mushroom powder or fresh mushroom pieces, very finely minced onion, fresh herbs, or spices. Just try to remember that you're just doctoring the meat, not making meatloaf, so no need to overdo it! 

12 ounce package Impossible or Beyond fake ground beef
1/4 cup crouton dust (use the food processor to pulverize the croutons)
1 TBSP Worcestershire
1 1/2 tsp liquid smoke
1 TBSP raw scrambled egg or Just Egg
1/2 tsp MSG
Healthy dose of black pepper
2-3 pinches garlic powder
A couple pinches sugar (optional)

Mix all ingredients well with your hands and then form into patties and cook in your normal manner.


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